I have something ridiculous to show you.

Having grown up in the 80s, I've always been wary of fake plastic drugstore nails. I think I bought some Lee Press-on Nails when I was in middle school. Do you remember those? No? Perhaps a visual aid will help.



I like how they come in "natural" and "glamour" length. Lee's idea of "natural" is more my idea of "glamour," but, whatever. I think at one time there was also a "sport" length, which I definitely remember buying.

Although as a teen, perhaps I should have been buying Miss Lee Press-on Nails. I definitely remember seeing this commercial on television.



I love this commercial. In particular I love the shot of the shoes - we called them "jazz shoes" - at the 15-second mark. I was crazy to have a pair of shoes like that circa 7th grade.

Anyway, I was never able to keep my Press-on Nails pressed on for more than an hour or so, plus, they looked terribly fake. (I suppose part of that could have been operator error.) So I've always been wary of the fake nails that are available in drugstores, because while fun and adorable, I figured there was no point unless you were going to glue them on.

Nonetheless, I saw a review of Nail Bliss nails on Scrangie and I had to have them. I figured I would just skip the adhesive tabs and glue them on. I bought the chrome ones in her review and also the faceted nails (SO AWESOME).

This weekend I finally had an opportunity to wear the nails. I couldn't commit to the glue, however, so I tried the adhesive tabs. And they worked great! These nails were crazy fun to wear.

AHHHH! I can't even stand how shiny they are. They were far too long for me right out of the package so I used nail clippers to hack them down to size and then gently filed off the rough edges. They are rather thick, plus using the adhesive tabs makes them somewhat thicker. Viewed close up, I suppose you can tell they are fake, but they didn't look tacky or jank. I felt like I had magical robot droid hands. They really reflect light, too, so if you were going to a concert or a club they would probably almost bling you to death.

I put them on at about 5 pm on Saturday night and removed them at around 7 pm on Sunday. They were fairly comfortable to wear although the thickness started to get to me after a while. I used a nail that was slightly too wide on one finger and that one was kind of sore while I wore the nails. But overall they didn't bother me, and they stayed on very securely.

Removal was easy. I just poured a few drops of pure acetone around the edges of each nail, waited a minute and then gently worked an orange stick underneath. They popped right off. A few of my nails were a little rough after that, but I just buffed them lightly. I did my nails with regular old polish right afterwards, and you can see that (aside from dry cuticles due to the acetone) there were no ill effects. (This is Funky Fingers Elephunk, a dupe to Color Club Wild Orchid.)

New OPIs, hooray!

So you may have heard some news recently about the Katy Perry collection from OPI. (That's a joke, because of course you've heard of it.) The collection is already out of stock at Transdesign and I totally missed being able to order Not Like The Movies, the only one I wanted from the set. Bummer. I suppose it's possible I'll find it out in the wild somewhere, but from what I hear this whole collection is flying out of stores so perhaps I shall just have to live without it.

Not to worry, there are other OPIs to get excited about. (And yes...I'm still in the throes of my OPI love...new collections can't come out fast enough for me as far as I am concerned.) For instance, the Serena Williams Glam Slam duo and the Texas collection. Yee-haw!

Sorry.

Anyway, here's the first color I tried from the Texas collection, It's Totally Fort Worth It.

Silvery gray with pink microglitter/shimmer. Quite pretty. When I was applying it, I had a sad trumpet moment when the first coat went on incredibly sheer. But it built well enough. This is three coats.

Perhaps work appropriate, if you have a more conservative office environment. Maybe just two coats if the office is super conservative.

Very subtle and delicate. I'm a sucker for most anything gray so this is win for me.

Except for this.

This is what Transdesign does to some of their OPI caps now. It's a gouge where a serial number should be. Kind of annoying, though not annoying enough to make me drive to Ulta and pay an additional $3 per bottle.

The other Texas colors I ordered are I Vant to Be A-Lone Star, Guy Meets Gal-veston and Don't Mess With OPI. Guy Meets Gal is a jelly and I think it's going to look super cute as a pedicure, should winter ever care to release its iron grip on Northeast Ohio.

As I mentioned, I missed out on Katy Perry but I did get the Serena Williams duo, which includes Black Shatter. Black Shatter is a crackle polish designed to be applied over dry nail polish, creating a shattered effect. I have to admit I didn't go wild for this one at first, but of course I ended up having to have it. I really liked the green in the Serena duo, so I just got the set.

Here's Black Shatter over Revlon Powder Puff, a squishy dreamy white with a blue flash.

AUGH. I love it!

Now I know a lot of people are excited about the upcoming China Glaze crackle polishes, but I won't be buying them. I will keep the few China Glaze colors I truly love (Emerald Sparkle, Stroll, Ruby Pumps) but owing to either body chemistry or some other whim of science, China Glaze just plain doesn't work on me. (I also hate their brush, but that's another story). So no Tronica, no Anchors Away, no crackles and no summer neons for me. I can't say I'm too sad.

I'll have to try my other Texas colors soon and let you know what I think!

Post-Holiday Wrap Up

Hello there.

I hope you all enjoyed your holiday break, whatever you celebrate. Mine was lovely. Time off is a wonderful thing, though of course the holiday rush makes it not so relaxing as you might like. To remedy that I had a three-day weekend that ended today, and we didn't do much besides cook and watch football.

Last time we spoke (more than a month ago!), I was eagerly anticipating my first ever BB Couture order. It arrived in due time but I regret to say that I neglected to photograph the three colors (Eve, Sex on the Beach, Horned Devil) that I wore. The holidays were kind of a whirlwind in terms of slapping nail polish on and running out the door only to (unsurprisingly) discover dents and smears when I arrived at my destination.

So, here are a few one-offs for you.


Barielle Elle's Spell! I believe this is from a holiday collection. I heard about this while in the grips of my frenzy to acquire the Ulta/OPI holiday exclusives after I had been told they weren't happening. I haunted two different Ulta's on what felt like two of the coldest days of the decade and didn't find the OPIs (at that point) but was able to grab Elle's Spell.


Pretty and lit from within.


Elle's Spell over black. My nails at this point can only be described as profoundly janky but I did like the look of this polish. If you missed it, don't fret: If you have Sally Hansen Hidden Treasure or Nubar 2010 you probably don't need this. Yes, the base is a jelly red but unless you want to wear it alone, that won't really matter.


OPI Cuckoo for this Color. I bought this when I finally acquired the Ulta/OPI holiday exclusives. Beautiful green with a teal/blue shimmer (that you can't see too well in this picture.


Barry M Block Orange, received in a swap from a nice lady in the UK. Jelly goodness.

As for my holiday nail colors, I didn't get too blingy or crazy because I have grown to truly detest removing glitter. I know this makes me a nail polish heretic in some quarters but I can't help it. So labor intensive! I wore Chanel Black Pearl on Christmas Eve and OPI Plum Full of Cheer (one of the Ulta holiday colors, and so pretty) after Christmas, and Illamasqua Fern on New Year's Eve.

What would you like to see next? I'm off buying for a while (of course...every time I say that, I fall off the wagon), but am happy to delve into my collection to show you some fun colors.